


so cold

by ramibvnd



Category: James Bond (Craig movies)
Genre: Agents, Gay, M/M, Q - Freeform, idkwhattotag, jamesbond - Freeform, m/m - Freeform, qplaystherapist
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-14
Updated: 2019-10-17
Packaged: 2020-12-31 01:07:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21029810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ramibvnd/pseuds/ramibvnd
Summary: James Bond lost 003 in a mission and returns more embittered than after Vesper's death. Therefor M is concerned about the double-O agent and his ability to assess a situation without feelings. He finds out, that exactly the opposite is happening, Bond assesses so cold, it seems like a machine is doing his work.Because of that M wants Q to talk to 007. Wants him to play the therapist for him. How could he know, that the brown curl head becomes a lot more for the agent? That he already was?





	1. 003

Note: Hi! I am new here on Archive of our Own + i'm not a native english speaker so please correct me! And I would be really grateful if someone would explain me how it works to do a new chapter. I really hope y'all enjoy this 00Q fan fiction!

* * *

,,Do you want to say anything, before I shoot the head of your precious 003 away?", the man laughed and reloaded the pistol. James tried to pull off his shackles but the cable tie and metal held. Blood rinned out of a big flesh wound at his temples and his pale blue eyes were wide open. He immediately stopped when he heard her voice: ,,James. Do. Not. Say. Anything." It wasn't more than a hoarse whisper but loud enough to hear. He looked into her grey eyes and saw nothing than pure belief into him. Her face was covered with blood and dirt, one of her hands is skinned and a big cut gashed at her leg. This bastard tortured her but she kept silence.  
,,Let me be brave", she said with a little sore smile. Than the bullet penetrated her head.

* * *

James sits in his apartment and stares at the envelope in his hands. _007, _is written on it in a small font. It's a letter from 003. _Emilia_. She knew she would die in this mission. Therefore she wrote letters to anyone she wanted to say something. M, Tanner, Moneypenny, 008 and he got one. A goddamn deathnote by his favorite double-O agent. Emilia wasn't a lover of him, oh no. The thing between them was more like a _friendship. _Both did not trust the other fully, both did their own thing yet they were there for each other. Not that James never thought about fucking her, Emilia was pretty and intelligent but something held him back. Bond could pretend it was the engagement ring which is wrong, because it was the fact she was a lesbian. No matter how interested he was in her, she never felt anything other than platonic affection for him. Plus someone else was and is spooking around in his mind. 

With a deep sigh he opened the letter. 

_Dear 007_

Suddenly a repetition of the details plays itself out as he starts reading.

_I'm with a high chance dead when you read this - I hope it wasn't painful._

She tried to oppress her scream when the man started torturing her. 

_But that's not what I wanna tell ya in this letter. I'd like to tell what you mean to me, what you are for me. _

She tried to be strong but he started skinning her hand and she screamed louder than a dying animal. 

_In the beginnings as a double O agent I was often unsure if I really belong here._

When he was finished with her first finger everywhere was blood and her whole body trembled. 

_Y'all seemed so habitual to the missions and traveling around the world in three days (between I loved Cuba with you). I felt so deplaced but you gave me the feeling that I could manage it. And I did. For this I am so grateful and I wish I could give you a kiss, sadly I am dead and engaged. Anyway I know you are not the type who likes long emotional texts. So I try to keep it as short as possible for me. _

Than his thugs came and ruined her face. But she was - compared to before- chilled about it. 

_James Bond, you should know, if I were attracted to men I'd definitely fuck you into the wall. And a lot more... I would use the word 'friend' to describe you. Even if our swaps were very charged and you did not concentrate on the things I told you when Q was around. So I leave it to him to bang you bloody. _

Probably he realised that it was more painful if he skin Emilia. Two hours full of screams and blood later her whole right hand was skinned.

_Don't mess it up with the genius and don't feel guilty because of me. I chose to die. Show your respect to me by accepting that. _

_xoxo_

_003 aka Emilia _

After the bullet tored her back and the blood squirt all over the room the agents came. Five seconds late. Five damn seconds. 

Bond lean back and close his eyes. It's typically Emilia to write about the business of others even when she's dead. Sadly she's wrong. He doesn't feel anything for Q. Not anymore. The quartermaster is past. He stands up stiff and throws the letter into a open drawer, before he exes Vodka and loads his weapon. Knowing he won't sleep this night, he picks his jacket form the clothe hook and walks out onto the enlivened streets of London. With a little bit luck there's a bar without a lot of people. _A place where a embittered agent could stay for himself, _Bond thinks and starts meandering his way through the people. 


	2. the empty chair

Here's part two, i hope you enjoy it! (And yes the title doesn't really fit but idc)

* * *

Q stares concentrated on the screen of his laptop and don't notice M who's entering his section. M glances over his shoulder and sees a lot of points hopping around on the screen. For a more experienced eye it's absolutely clear, that this is a constantly changing firewall. 

,,What are you exactly doing Q? Playing the hacker version of Slitherio?", M asks and observes how Q flinches. The brown haired genius turns around and begins to stutter: ,,No Sir. I'm trying to crack this firewall so we can use it for the files which are filed and shouldn't be opened again."

Now M is interested:,,And this works?"

,,As I said, first I need to crack it. And after this I have some improvements in mind, for example that the firewall divides itself like a cell, when a someone fails cracking it", Q says eagerly and his brown eyes radiate. _M decided right when she appointed him to the Quartermaster, _Gareth thinks and gives Q a slender smile. 

,,Sadly I am not here to look how you do new security systems. Actually I want to know if 007 was here."

,,Bond? Not that I'm aware of. Why? Does he already have a new mission and needs new equipment?"

,,No. He won't go on the fields soon. Even tho he seems as cold and focused as before, I'm afraid the death of 003 hit him harder than he wants to present. And I have no idea if he's still able to assess a situation emotionless."

Slowly Q starts realizing what M wants form him. But it doesn't please Q. ,,Sir you want me to take care of him. To keep watch on him and to rate his skills."

,,Exactly Q."

,,Sir, with all respect I don't think I'm qualified to rate a double-O agent. I-"

,,That's an order Q. You'll get paid suspended when you're with him. Good evening.", M means harsh and leaves with big steps the section. 

Q takes off his glassed sighing and rubs his nasal root. His chief forces him to spend time with the agent he may have feelings for. _May?, _his inner sardonic voice laughs, _you love this agent since Spectre and now you're pretending not to. Piteous creature. Your grandfather would turn around in his grave. _Angrily Q commands himself to be silent. He doesn't wanna think about the tall blonde man who makes his heart skip whenever he gives him one of his suspicious smiles. After he's been thinking about Bond for a while, Q looks at his watch and curses. It's already 7 pm and he's got a rendezvous at eight o'clock. Hasty he collects his stuff together and stashes it in his bag, than he runs out of the section. With a little bit luck one of the taxis is free. 

* * *

Q doesn't wear a classy black suit that often, actually never. But now he stands before the mirror and observes the stranger man. The suit makes his shoulder broader and gives him the look of a ... agent. ,,Stop", Q growls and run through his tousled hair, ,,He does not have to return on my mind all the time." Q makes a short detour in the kitchen, where he fills his cat's bowls, before he grabs his cloak. Once he opens the door, the cold beats against him and his breath produces little clouds in the air. 

He feels like a little fish in the crowds on the streets. Not like a highly intelligent MI6 employee, not at all special. His thoughts get interrupted by his ringing phone. _Phoebe _stands on the screen and he picks up: ,,Yes.”

,,I’m going to come ten minutes later. Juan had some problems with his car and I drove him home.”

,, I did not ask for the reason. “, Q replies low-key annoyed.

Immediately Phoebe gives back: ,, You could really try to socialize more. Not always let the _super-secret-crass-work _hang out. Really, it’s weird how you act sometimes.”

,, Shut up Phoebe and concentrate on the street.”

Three minutes later Q enters a restaurant which is filled with people but thanks to the partitions you still have privacy. Such noble restaurants are usually not where Q takes his meals but Phoebe loves this places. A waiter walks to him and after Q said his name, he leads him to a table in the middle of the hall. Candles, silverware and fake roses stands on it and it looks like a romantic dinner - not what Q wanted, he doesn't plan to do incest. While Q seesaws with his foot, he inspects the happy faces of the guests. Only one couple seems pissed and at a table of eight people argue prevails but the rest is without exception happy. Impatiently Q looks at his watch and he can't suppress the rising anger. Phoebe is already 18 minutes late. When he almost gives up to see his sister this evening, a fake Saint-Lauren bag gets smacked on the table. With the bag a wave of a sticky perfume comes and than his sister sits vis-à-vis. She wears tons of make-up (in Q's eyes it looks like a painting), at her neck and wrists strum heavy jewellery and her skin looks faked tanned. The only natural at Phoebe are the wavy brown curls on her head. 

,,You're nails are sharper and longer than the ones of my cats", notice Q and in the same moment he'd like to slap himself. The relation between him and his sister isn't the best and now when she finally agreed to do something with him, he starts the conversation with a affront. 

Phoebe immediately poisons back: ,,Did you also notice that your hair looks like a duplicate of the stork's nest? No wonder you're still single. Get yourself our of this awful tramp look!"

,,It's still _my _business who I date and how I look, Phoebe. And just because you can't have children I don't need to have some!"

,,Here's it again: You just think about yourself! You don't think about mum who'd like to have grand-children, no you just think about yourself!"

,,Your impotence is definitely not my problem!", Q yells. 

With tears in her eyes Phoebe stands up and burry her claws in the tablecloth: ,,Fuck you Heath!"

She grabs her bag and leaves the restaurant in a pace. ,,Well done", Q congrats himself and stares helpless on the empty chair on the other side. Only a little brown blot of tan-creme shows that someone was here. It's a topic he hates. His sister is in essence a good character but since the doctors told her she would never be able to rise her own children her behavior has a crack. She's obsessed with the idea of Q having children and speaks up this at every rendezvous they have. Therefor Q never mentioned he's gay. Phoebe would probably kill him. 

Suddenly a waiter comes and he looks a little bit confused at the empty chair. ,,My rendezvous will come soon", Q answers the unasked question. Feverish he thinks of someone who would have time to show up at a noble restaurant right now. Nervously he bites on his lip, before he fishes his mobile phone out of his pocket and clicks with trembling fingers on the contact. 


End file.
